Journal 2006

Where are You, God?

In the heavens far away?

On another planet?

High above the earth

Watching over us?

How do I find You,

Seek You,

Search You out?

I know You’re in my heart,

But today I do not feel You.

By faith I know You’re there—

So close I could reach out and touch Your face.

But all I feel is fog and mist.

“Where are You?” echoes back.

            “Where are You?”

                        “Where are You?”

A 2025 Update. The truth is God is always present whether I feel Him or not. I have learned that when God feels far away, it’s often because some part of my heart is trying to control, manipulate, push away, avoid, or guard against feeling pain. Once that Guardian part of my heart lets go, stands down, or admits I’m feeling something I’m trying to avoid, and I begin to feel the underlying emotion, that’s when I give God permission to step in and minister to my heart. And no longer does He feel far away.